Tag: #life

Happiness…Pursue the Moment

Brad

I last wrote in June of 2022 that my fiancée and I had recently purchased a house, and outlined what the experience was like at what might have been – but has proven not to be, at least in my area – the peak of the housing boom. 2022 was certainly a big year for us – getting engaged, buying a house, planning, and then having our wedding.

2023 will be about execution – finishing the novel that I started years ago, pursuing a path to business ownership, and growing relationships.

To get there, I plan to make it the year that I live the most deliberately. Each day, each moment – are where things happen. I also turned 30 in 2022, and while I don’t particularly believe in magic moments at certain age thresholds, I do believe in the wisdom gained from additional life experience. If there is anything that my twenties taught me, it is that time is only abundant for those that take advantage of the moment…the present. A lifetime may seem short or it might seem long – in reality, you can argue that both are true.

I wrote in 2019 about the Freedom of Time. Well, nothing has changed on that front. Time is still a diminishing asset and one should include the pursuit of this freedom as a rationale for wealth accumulation. But why not also live for today? I don’t mean this as a pitch for a YOLO mentality, I simply mean…write that book. Start that business. Work on your relationships – make a concerted effort to see your family and friends. Give back to your community. Be outdoors. Whatever it is that you know deep down are the things that are important to you, spend time in those places and with those people. The happiest moments of my life thus far were when I was spending time with friends and family, living in an entirely new city and soaking it all in, and periods where I found that I was learning and growing. Most of which has occurred when I had absolutely no money.

Pursue the moment. And as my father would say…it’s not the destination, it’s the journey.

What do you want to do with the rest of your life?

Brad

When someone asks you – or formerly asked you depending on how far along you are in adulthood – what you want to do with the rest of your life, it is entirely normal not to know.

I dislike the question for several reasons, but my top two would be: (1) it suggests there is one particular thing that you can or should be doing with your existence and (2) it is often carries the connotation that, in the event you don’t know what that one career or job is, that you are somehow “behind”.

It’s rather presumptuous, particularly when you consider that by some measures fewer than half of the American population is satisfied with their job.

Now, the real question is, if you don’t know what you want to do for work, how do you figure it out? Where should you start?

First, realize that you are not alone…not by a long shot. Many, many people are in the exact same boat.

Personally, I have explored a number of avenues myself. I also recognize that it is unlikely that I will be doing one job, or even remain in one industry forever. Below, I share with you some of the techniques and strategies I have found useful.

Strategies for Career Discover

1) I recognize that my career and my vocation may not be one and the same. In other words, my personal calling may not be fulfilled through my career, and I may not even want it to be. It is quite possible that this may be the case for you as well.

Do you love to write but you don’t want a role that requires you to write constantly because you actually find that you start to resent it? Perhaps you love volunteer work and find that this brings fulfillment. Great! You may be sitting right on top of your own answer and you just hadn’t listened to yourself yet. In that situation, it may look something like the following:

Work/Career ($) + Vocation (Volunteering) = Contentment

The job in this instance is just the venue by which you derive compensation to live and play.

2) Ignore the “follow your passion mantra”. That’s right, I said it.

The best literature I have seen that talked about passion, was in the Harvard Business Review. There were three big takeaways:

i. “Passion is not something one finds, but rather, it is to be developed.”

ii. “It is challenging to pursue your passion, especially as it wanes over time.”

 and

iii. “Passion can lead us astray, and it is therefore important to recognize its limits.”

3) As Simon Sinek says, “Start with Why”. How do you define success? Notice I didn’t mention anything about how society or your perception of how society defines success.

Similarly, what would you consider your currency in life? Is it money? Time? Special moments with loved ones?

Recognizing that this is quite a bit to chew on, I will summarize by suggesting some self-introspection. Spend some time looking inward. That high paying job (doing something you don’t actually want to do) in a city that takes you an hour each way to reach (forcing you to miss your son’s baseball game), may not be what you really want.

4) Last but certainly not least, try and try again. If you initially set out on a path and find that you need to make a detour, do it. Make that detour. Or, if you set your career ladder up on the wrong wall, move the ladder to a new wall. It really is that simple sometimes. In the end, we are human and being human means, we have the tendency to overcomplicate!

You already have the answer, you just need to unearth it.